Kirsten's Notebook

 Sheryl Sandberg's manifesto for white middle-class feminists,  Lean In , is a guilty pleasure of mine. I've read it a few times and honestly find it really useful because, um, I'm a white middle-class feminist. My favourite chapter of the book is titled "Don't leave before you leave". It tells the story of a young woman who approached Sheryl and asked a series of panicked questions about how to balance work and family life. As the conversations progressed, it eventually came out that this young woman wasn't expecting a baby and didn't even have a boyfriend yet, she just wanted to be prepared. And what preparation looked like to this young woman was potentially working at a certain kind of company in a certain kind of role, even though she could still be 5 or 10 years away from having children! Thinking about the future balance of work and children may be the most common reason for opting out of roles, but I'm sure it's not the only one. People

At EA Global last month, I saw a talk between Julia Wise and Alex Gordon-Brown about parenting. He made an off-hand comment that having a satisfying personal life makes it easier to deal when work isn't going well. That seems so relateable to me! I get a huge sense of meaning and purpose and fulfillment from my job and feel pretty down or frustrated when it's not going well. But there are some things in my personal life, like being married to my awesome husband, my involvement in the EA community, and feeling valued and included and needed in my group of friends that also gives me a sense of meaning and connection and which balances out the highs and lows from my job. I can totally believe that parenting has a similar effect. For my own benefit, and for anyone who may be reading, I'm going to brainstorm some other examples of ways people experience meaning and connection and fulfillment that I could potentially add to my life: Doing repairs around your house - experiencing